4 Days of Deep Focus

I am hella overwhelmed.

For the last few weeks, I’ve been frantically bogged down in a mire of, “What next?!” What should I do for work? Where should I be looking? Should I leave New York? Do I just want to be single? Which part of all of this should I prioritize?

Soaking in the tub and watching the Gilmore Girls revival (why can’t I stop watching this stupid show?!), Lorelei’s complete lack of direction had me totally angsty because I, too, feel like everything around me is moving, and I’m standing still.”

So starting tomorrow, I’m slowing everything around me down for a while.

Continue reading

Everything Bagel Days = Every Challenge All At Once!

Today is January 28th, and life is insane.

There’s the Meatball, which is what I’m currently calling a certain POTUS–I won’t explain further. There’s everything I’ve detailed here and here and here. And then there are oddly beautiful moments where all of that scary noise just…. stops….

….and I’m drinking coffee and petting my dog and looking at trees. Or I’m doing my #CityMouseCountryHouse thing and filling up the Lil Blue Subaru and see the tiniest bird hopping by the tire with a twig in its beak and am enthralled by the pattern of its feathers. Or I’m watching my grandmother as she sleeps and the thinness of her skin just astounds me. Or I’m on the subway and my breath catches at the idea of just how complicated the lives are of every single one of the sixty people around me and my heart bursts with love for all of them.

Life. Continue reading

Cheating (but only a little)

Confession: The television abstinence has stretched a bit. This week, there have been nights I’ve watched 2-3 shows when I felt like it.

I justified the choice by a) the world is ending b) MY BODY HATES LIFE and c) there were nights in the last week or two when I hadn’t watched any television at all. On Monday (I think it was) I watched three very short shows. But here’s the thing: last night I started steaming Supergirl, which I’m way into because right now I just need to watch good gals kick ass. I was so damned tired after two episodes and wanted to watch a third. But I didn’t. I shut the television off and went to sleep.

And that’s the point of all this. Recognizing the habit, and choosing to change it.

So I did cheat. But only a little.

Conundrum 

These are the facts: 

  • I am so so so tired. Like, I worked way too long and hard today on top of having gone to the far reaches of Queens to see my tios for lunch. So spoons are gone. 
  • It’s 8:30pm
  • I’m finally eating dinner on bed.
  • I didn’t watch any television for the last two evenings, as I was reading a very lovely book and that took precedence.
  • There are only about forty pages left in said book. 
  • I have three twenty-minute shows sitting unwatched in my Hulu queue I normally like to watch together. 

So, options:  Continue reading

New Year, New Challenge, New Wonder Woman

I need to work on confidence. My spirit, energy, life force, qi, whatever, is shrinking.

I’ve become more introverted, quieter, and fulfilled by gentler adventures these past few years. To a certain extent, this pleases me; our edges soften as we age, right? And hell, my twenties were certainly raucous enough for one lifetime. But then there’s the part I do not choose, and cannot control. The part that is purely physical, determined by that stupid bug that bit me so many stupid years ago. The part that I can’t do anything about. Or can I? Continue reading

I’m Not Texting This Weekend

A few months ago, I got pitched to write about the No Text Weekend, where people around the world pledge to not text (!) from 7pm Friday to 7pm Sunday this weekend.

If ever there was the pitch for me, I tell ya!

I immediately wrote about it for Bust, then approached the ladies running it, Allison Goldberg and Jen Jamula, about collaborating for Love Bites. They kicked ass with Ben last week when I was in the Acores (listen to it here, it’s one of my favorite episodes ever), and we planned an event where I’d host a panel discussion on texting and new relationships that would play live on Heritage as part of the Weekend’s events.

And now the weekend is here… Continue reading