I am hella overwhelmed.
For the last few weeks, I’ve been frantically bogged down in a mire of, “What next?!” What should I do for work? Where should I be looking? Should I leave New York? Do I just want to be single? Which part of all of this should I prioritize?
Soaking in the tub and watching the Gilmore Girls revival (why can’t I stop watching this stupid show?!), Lorelei’s complete lack of direction had me totally angsty because I, too, feel like “everything around me is moving, and I’m standing still.”
So starting tomorrow, I’m slowing everything around me down for a while.
Tomorrow starts four Everything Bagel days, where I’m slated to do every Challenge I’ve done thus far at once. This last month, I gave up coffee, television, comfy clothes, and working past five pm, each for a week. Before that came several-month-long-studies of zero waste, negative thought, gifting, sugar, shopping, and social media.
Abstaining from all of these won’t serve me well this week.
I’ve got a full week coming up. I’ll need a lot of coffee. I’ll have to work past five. I’ll need to collapse in bed and stare at the television. I won’t be able to 100% attend to making sure that I’m adhering to the strict rules I set forth for myself for those longer Challenges. Plus, Friday marks the beginning of my final forty days of this Year! I’m not sure what I’ll be doing for that yet, and I really want the headspace to figure it out! I’m excited, nervous, and sad by this culmination. I want it to be significant. I want the headspace to focus.
This Year is all about making space to bring new things in. It’s about decluttering not just physical space, but mental and emotional, too.
What can I take during this insane week that will give me the headspace to focus?
Much of my angst has come from an overwhelm of options and no clear path. I’m on a dozen job boards and fielding pitches and submissions. I’m tackling pressing to-do lists and ones sketched for long-term investment. I’m trying to support the relationships I treasure. I’m tending to my heart, pride, and body. I’m feeling lost in a mire of technology and art and people and ideas and bank accounts.
This week, I’ll quiet the white noise. I’ll slow the spinning. I’ll take out:
- Social media — tonight, it’s off the phone and back to Hootsuite scheduling.
- Emails from job boards, politicians, nerdy word sites, newsletters, and non-profits. — They’ll get filed for Friday, or erased if not necessary.
- Invitations and making plans — No no no. Not this week.
- Anything creative that doesn’t give me joy right now — If I don’t wanna write it / shoot it / draw it, I’m not gonna. I’ll sit and think through this shit instead.
On top of this goes sugar, alcohol, shopping, negative thought, and as much of my Zero Waste philosophy as I can. Most of those things are still in play, but these rules will help me make the best judgment call if I’m tempted otherwise.
Finally, I’ll try to plug things into my space that help bring focus and clarity, like calming music, meditations, mantras, whatever it takes. I’ll make space so that I can focus.